[No, it's not enough. Because he's running low on everything he's got right now. Buck up you old sack of shit. They are here, aren't they? He's not dashing to a phone to rat you out..]
You were gone for 'bout three weeks.
[Tensions boiling up past a point he felt he could handle. It was like Larry was shot out of a barrel of a gun into the moment as well. Mr. White again, Joe shouting and Eddie whining like a stuck pig. They were already gone to him before, they would be once again. How did it somehow still hurt?
[Do you have to, Dimmy? Goddamn the temptation is sickening, but Freddy doesn't want to flirt with death so soon. He looks away from the cigarette but not from Larry himself, which is very hard to do, for your information.]
Long time.
[He remarks the obvious. Painfully obvious. Stupidly obvious. You shouldn't have said it at all, Newendyke. Then he blurts out.]
I'm sorry.
[For leaving the way he did. For not wanting to talk about certain things. For being a cop.]
[If there is any sort of respite to have, it's at his lips unlit. He flicks his lighter open then shut.]
Yeah.
[Two days were too long, and then he thought that three were far too long. And when it kept going? Well. That goes without saying.]
It's not like you wanted to cash out so soon.
[Right? And even though he is pulled down in the undertow of darker, more selfish emotions Larry knows that Freddy would never have left without him and if he had to, if he knew it would not have been without a goodbye. That is what he's apologizing for, he figures. It's too late to apologize for being a cop. Far too late.]
I dunno why you had to still get stuck in the gut.
[Or he still had to shoot Joe. Now he clicks the lighter open and lights.]
Not like you wanted any of it to happen like this. Y'don't need to be sorry.
[Freddy's not going to address the hint of implication in Larry's words. It's true he'd never leave without a goodbye, if he ever wanted to leave at all.]
I don't know...maybe it was meant to be, you know? Like fate or something.
[Like them still finding each other as their own real company. First it was when Freddy got shot, then it was when they were blasted off to some god forsaken alternate dimension, now it's here in a shitty Mexican motel. Of course they're only talking about his bullet hole.]
[Bullet holes not the ones in other organs. Ears are open and he's trying to keep his tired, fucked up mind too. Larry inhales. When he exhales he keeps it away from Freddy. Delicate condition and all.]
Or maybe it was the price we had to pay for it all, you know? Seeing as all the good shit we had, it couldn't have been for free.
[Even with their work and time put in. The City was all about hidden dues to be paid. Freddy had to spill his blood, the old man had to either do that or someone else's. Maybe that's just it.
They're not gonna talk about love tonight. Just the fact. So what if he did, Dimmy. Is it going to truly make him feel any better to know what's riding on their successful run? That's what you call pressure. Is this worth it for Freddy?]
[Freddy remarks, a little more in a joking manner than any way else as if to draw attention to the fact that he did spend three years with Lawrence Dimick. He may not want to talk about that right now but he did spend years with him and doesn't regret it. If they can make it four years...well, he'd like to. But how? That's what he doesn't want to talk about at all.]
[Nod, nod. Puff. Puff. Funny words from a funny guy, a grin is pulling hard on his mouth. Larry doesn't outwardly give too much away.]
I'm hard headed. Maybe heard of hearing.
[Or he was. Might be is. His body feels a little off. And not because of the miles put between the United States and south of the border. Larry taps ash and studies the other man's mug.
Years. They spent that together. No one can take that away. A night with conversation on business wouldn't do that, right?]
[Freddy shakes his head. He could be implying something but it could just as well be an assurance to the old man that his body's not as old as he thinks it is. Without another thought the kid puts a hand on the other man's shoulder, touch solid but not gripping.]
[A nose rub and a nod. Pathetic doesn't look good on anyone. And even if he was trying to play it cool with self depreciation, he is on the road to full out sulking. Nothing beyond repair has gone down. Freddy's touch even in the stifling air of the motel is a welcomed contact.]
You're welcome.
[A tilt of his head and it's more wavy brown close to honey blonde. Cigarette smoke of the second degree might help the patient's need. Maybe.]
You know I would one way or the other, right? I'm there for you.
[And the old man has privately decided that would be the case too if they part. If. If. If.]
[Honey blonde isn't quite as floppy and nice as it usually is but he brushes against undyed graying brown anyway.]
I'm here for you too, okay?
[Freddy insists. If he could guarantee the old man's safety he would but he can't and that's a hard pill to swallow. Even harder now that he's in Larry's boat. Could Freddy claim kidnapping? Easily. But would he? No.]
[More smoke hits the air from his Chesterfield. The box is almost spent. He's been going through a pack and a half, working close to two. Better cool it or else he might get himself a trip to the hospital too. Then what.]
That puts me more at ease, partner.
[The air practically buzzes with words White wants to say. Questions of why it can't be a night to talk about exactly what page their on. There will be another night if they plan just right.]
Tomorrow we're going to head inland. After that, I say we hit the coast. We don't have to keep a tight schedule but we're going off the beaten path. I'm sure they'll check tourist routes.
[They--the cops, maybe even the FBI. Who the hell knows. Larry talks softly, his own voice feels soothing like this isn't the fate of their freedom under discussion.]
[Freddy insists, not because that puts Larry's hands on the wheel and thus all accountability with him or anything. Nevermind how if caught that's probably how the authorities would spin it in an effort to hide the fact this man betrayed his own. They're a media circus in the making. They cannot be caught.]
I've never been out this far into Mexico. I don't know the place. Shit I barely know the language.
[This is the kid's way of telling the old man he might be fucking useless out here in the wild fucking west.]
[Adaptable, calm. Important things so as not to get caught. Larry's been running for so long, he isn't going to get sloppy when the stakes are so high.]
And that's alright. Don't kid yourself thinking everyone hear speaks it like a pro. You'll catch on eventually. Some things go beyond language. You got the right eyes and ears to take in the right information.
[People pointing. A meaningful gaze. Any sort of a law enforcement person on the move the old man hopes. It takes one to know one.]
[He points at his own peepers, caramel sour apple greens. Maybe, he thinks, those years in the city were meant to be preparation for this. They have three years and a cache of future knowledge to their advantage. To their disadvantage, no smartphones or internet. Freddy wonders if they're better off faking their own deaths.]
And you can be the navigator too. I might speak the the mother tongue in these parts but I usually go to the coast first. We will later.
[Referring back to the rural route. His cigarette is burning away fast. Laying nearby in the room and thinking over the next step is not entirely calming. There's nothing like finding reassuring partnership for the journey in those green peepers.]
If everything goes smooth, down the line we can leave to go someplace else.
[To give one more bright star to reach for. Larry hopes that would mean they could go together.]
[Freddy says, more so to joke about his qualifications as a navigator at the moment rather than anything else. He's so banged up he might not be the best but driven to stay alive with his old man he'd be efficient.]
I want to go some place else.
[The kid nods, reaffirming something he still can't quite put in words. That life in Los Angeles is gone, if he's honest about what he's doing now he'll never ever get it bad. He doesn't deserve to wear the badge anymore. But that doesn't mean Freddy can't take what's left and turn it into something good.]
We've had better, we don't need to be stuck in a dump like this forever. [See, old man? He's talking about the future. The near future sure, but it is the future.]
I got a few. [Wait a sec while he stubs out his smoke. While looking away it is easier to say...] I actually didn't take much of a look. Maybe over breakfast.
[After some sleep and a clear head.]
That's the main goal. Start from the bottom and work our way back to the top.
[Pat, pat on him.]
I have some money put away. We can get it tomorrow. It'll help, that's for sure.
[Maybe one more night in a low grade motel before more clothes and better accommodations. Larry rubs his heavy brown eyes.]
You think you'll need to check in with a clinic within the next four days?
[To check his healing process. He can tell that Freddy's energy is still low. He's not the ghost bleeding out on the ramp but that doesn't mean he is race ready. They have to keep moving. Otherwise the old man would insist that they take a week or two to allow the kid a full chance at recuperating.
Even though they should be listening to the radio or watching TV, Larry can't bring himself to. Not yet. Right back to the bygone year. Same old shit. Besides, who wants to hear what they're saying about either of them if the story goes this far south. He still stares blankly at the television as he makes himself more comfortable on the bed.]
[As a police officer he'd do the same but insist he's fine and let the onus be on his partner to drag him in. None of that now, Newendyke.]
I don't want an infection, not out here. [With no state of the art City General to fix it.] Good money?
[What makes money 'good' is open to interpretation. Freddy asks, going backwards in Larry's words. He's already comfortable in bed, as comfortable as he can be, and watches the old man make himself at home on the same mattress. Nothing doing, nothing they haven't been doing for three whole fucking years.]
I don't want you with an infection. You got nothing to amputate there.
[All those vitals at his torso and middle. Infection would be a nightmare, as though death isn't to be considered. Oh it is. Now more than ever. Here you die. That's it. No rejuvenation, no restart like a video game.
Would death take them to the City again? Larry doesn't want to find out. The cleaner they used for the sheets--hey at least they clean here--reminds him of a hospital. Sanitary and stifling.]
Good money. [He repeats.] Cash. No bank involved. Things I kept stowed away.
[The old man had wanted to retreat south after the heist. Now would be a lousy time to try and find the places he was scouting to live. They were more toward Baja anyway.]
[Freddy asks, less interested in the money itself, how much he has, and more interested in a time when Larry was on the move without Freddy. Long before they met perhaps. It's better than talking about anything else related to the here and now, at least while they have the down time. No need for logistics, no need for immediate action, just talking.]
I wanna say it's been only a year. Time goes so fucking fast. I wouldn't be surprised if it was two. A blink or two and it's flown by.
[Their time in the City for example. He settles on the bed and studies the ceiling a moment thoughtfully.]
I got a good feeling it's still where I left it. [The money he means of course.] Some things just don't fucking change. Not down here. That's part of why I like it.
[Loving and in good humor, he holds it together long enough to give a stern look before laughing.]
That diner is two miles out of Four Corners. Not Chinatown. I got money all over because I never know where I'm gonna be. The plan was to pull it all together before heading over.
[His plan alone.]
Some people can't go up to an ATM and get cash out.
[Holding back when they're partners with equal shares goes right against the way of things. Larry tries to comb Freddy's hair just like he tries to smooth over that doubt.]
Just in case I'll write em down so if anything happens, you'll know where to start looking.
[Providing again, sharing too. A link between them that's more than blood. Not quite that L word.]
Y'got plenty, man. Don't fret a second. Pulling it together is the bitch.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
orangetoughguy) wrote2010-08-06 11:39 pm
no subject
You were gone for 'bout three weeks.
[Tensions boiling up past a point he felt he could handle. It was like Larry was shot out of a barrel of a gun into the moment as well. Mr. White again, Joe shouting and Eddie whining like a stuck pig. They were already gone to him before, they would be once again. How did it somehow still hurt?
He's getting a cigarette out after all.]
I waited for you. I didn't believe you were gone.
no subject
Long time.
[He remarks the obvious. Painfully obvious. Stupidly obvious. You shouldn't have said it at all, Newendyke. Then he blurts out.]
I'm sorry.
[For leaving the way he did. For not wanting to talk about certain things. For being a cop.]
no subject
Yeah.
[Two days were too long, and then he thought that three were far too long. And when it kept going? Well. That goes without saying.]
It's not like you wanted to cash out so soon.
[Right? And even though he is pulled down in the undertow of darker, more selfish emotions Larry knows that Freddy would never have left without him and if he had to, if he knew it would not have been without a goodbye. That is what he's apologizing for, he figures. It's too late to apologize for being a cop. Far too late.]
I dunno why you had to still get stuck in the gut.
[Or he still had to shoot Joe. Now he clicks the lighter open and lights.]
Not like you wanted any of it to happen like this. Y'don't need to be sorry.
no subject
I don't know...maybe it was meant to be, you know? Like fate or something.
[Like them still finding each other as their own real company. First it was when Freddy got shot, then it was when they were blasted off to some god forsaken alternate dimension, now it's here in a shitty Mexican motel. Of course they're only talking about his bullet hole.]
no subject
Or maybe it was the price we had to pay for it all, you know? Seeing as all the good shit we had, it couldn't have been for free.
[Even with their work and time put in. The City was all about hidden dues to be paid. Freddy had to spill his blood, the old man had to either do that or someone else's. Maybe that's just it.
They're not gonna talk about love tonight. Just the fact. So what if he did, Dimmy. Is it going to truly make him feel any better to know what's riding on their successful run? That's what you call pressure. Is this worth it for Freddy?]
no subject
[Freddy remarks, a little more in a joking manner than any way else as if to draw attention to the fact that he did spend three years with Lawrence Dimick. He may not want to talk about that right now but he did spend years with him and doesn't regret it. If they can make it four years...well, he'd like to. But how? That's what he doesn't want to talk about at all.]
no subject
I'm hard headed. Maybe heard of hearing.
[Or he was. Might be is. His body feels a little off. And not because of the miles put between the United States and south of the border. Larry taps ash and studies the other man's mug.
Years. They spent that together. No one can take that away. A night with conversation on business wouldn't do that, right?]
no subject
[Freddy shakes his head. He could be implying something but it could just as well be an assurance to the old man that his body's not as old as he thinks it is. Without another thought the kid puts a hand on the other man's shoulder, touch solid but not gripping.]
Thanks for taking care of me.
[You know that he cares, right Dimmy?]
no subject
You're welcome.
[A tilt of his head and it's more wavy brown close to honey blonde. Cigarette smoke of the second degree might help the patient's need. Maybe.]
You know I would one way or the other, right? I'm there for you.
[And the old man has privately decided that would be the case too if they part. If. If. If.]
no subject
[Honey blonde isn't quite as floppy and nice as it usually is but he brushes against undyed graying brown anyway.]
I'm here for you too, okay?
[Freddy insists. If he could guarantee the old man's safety he would but he can't and that's a hard pill to swallow. Even harder now that he's in Larry's boat. Could Freddy claim kidnapping? Easily. But would he? No.]
no subject
[More smoke hits the air from his Chesterfield. The box is almost spent. He's been going through a pack and a half, working close to two. Better cool it or else he might get himself a trip to the hospital too. Then what.]
That puts me more at ease, partner.
[The air practically buzzes with words White wants to say. Questions of why it can't be a night to talk about exactly what page their on. There will be another night if they plan just right.]
Tomorrow we're going to head inland. After that, I say we hit the coast. We don't have to keep a tight schedule but we're going off the beaten path. I'm sure they'll check tourist routes.
[They--the cops, maybe even the FBI. Who the hell knows. Larry talks softly, his own voice feels soothing like this isn't the fate of their freedom under discussion.]
no subject
[Freddy insists, not because that puts Larry's hands on the wheel and thus all accountability with him or anything. Nevermind how if caught that's probably how the authorities would spin it in an effort to hide the fact this man betrayed his own. They're a media circus in the making. They cannot be caught.]
I've never been out this far into Mexico. I don't know the place. Shit I barely know the language.
[This is the kid's way of telling the old man he might be fucking useless out here in the wild fucking west.]
no subject
Sorta. I'm just trying to keep us adaptable.
[Adaptable, calm. Important things so as not to get caught. Larry's been running for so long, he isn't going to get sloppy when the stakes are so high.]
And that's alright. Don't kid yourself thinking everyone hear speaks it like a pro. You'll catch on eventually. Some things go beyond language. You got the right eyes and ears to take in the right information.
[People pointing. A meaningful gaze. Any sort of a law enforcement person on the move the old man hopes. It takes one to know one.]
no subject
I got'em peeled.
[He points at his own peepers, caramel sour apple greens. Maybe, he thinks, those years in the city were meant to be preparation for this. They have three years and a cache of future knowledge to their advantage. To their disadvantage, no smartphones or internet. Freddy wonders if they're better off faking their own deaths.]
no subject
[Referring back to the rural route. His cigarette is burning away fast. Laying nearby in the room and thinking over the next step is not entirely calming. There's nothing like finding reassuring partnership for the journey in those green peepers.]
If everything goes smooth, down the line we can leave to go someplace else.
[To give one more bright star to reach for. Larry hopes that would mean they could go together.]
no subject
[Freddy says, more so to joke about his qualifications as a navigator at the moment rather than anything else. He's so banged up he might not be the best but driven to stay alive with his old man he'd be efficient.]
I want to go some place else.
[The kid nods, reaffirming something he still can't quite put in words. That life in Los Angeles is gone, if he's honest about what he's doing now he'll never ever get it bad. He doesn't deserve to wear the badge anymore. But that doesn't mean Freddy can't take what's left and turn it into something good.]
We've had better, we don't need to be stuck in a dump like this forever. [See, old man? He's talking about the future. The near future sure, but it is the future.]
no subject
[After some sleep and a clear head.]
That's the main goal. Start from the bottom and work our way back to the top.
[Pat, pat on him.]
I have some money put away. We can get it tomorrow. It'll help, that's for sure.
[Maybe one more night in a low grade motel before more clothes and better accommodations. Larry rubs his heavy brown eyes.]
You think you'll need to check in with a clinic within the next four days?
[To check his healing process. He can tell that Freddy's energy is still low. He's not the ghost bleeding out on the ramp but that doesn't mean he is race ready. They have to keep moving. Otherwise the old man would insist that they take a week or two to allow the kid a full chance at recuperating.
Even though they should be listening to the radio or watching TV, Larry can't bring himself to. Not yet. Right back to the bygone year. Same old shit. Besides, who wants to hear what they're saying about either of them if the story goes this far south. He still stares blankly at the television as he makes himself more comfortable on the bed.]
no subject
[As a police officer he'd do the same but insist he's fine and let the onus be on his partner to drag him in. None of that now, Newendyke.]
I don't want an infection, not out here. [With no state of the art City General to fix it.] Good money?
[What makes money 'good' is open to interpretation. Freddy asks, going backwards in Larry's words. He's already comfortable in bed, as comfortable as he can be, and watches the old man make himself at home on the same mattress. Nothing doing, nothing they haven't been doing for three whole fucking years.]
no subject
[All those vitals at his torso and middle. Infection would be a nightmare, as though death isn't to be considered. Oh it is. Now more than ever. Here you die. That's it. No rejuvenation, no restart like a video game.
Would death take them to the City again? Larry doesn't want to find out. The cleaner they used for the sheets--hey at least they clean here--reminds him of a hospital. Sanitary and stifling.]
Good money. [He repeats.] Cash. No bank involved. Things I kept stowed away.
[The old man had wanted to retreat south after the heist. Now would be a lousy time to try and find the places he was scouting to live. They were more toward Baja anyway.]
no subject
[Freddy asks, less interested in the money itself, how much he has, and more interested in a time when Larry was on the move without Freddy. Long before they met perhaps. It's better than talking about anything else related to the here and now, at least while they have the down time. No need for logistics, no need for immediate action, just talking.]
no subject
[Their time in the City for example. He settles on the bed and studies the ceiling a moment thoughtfully.]
I got a good feeling it's still where I left it. [The money he means of course.] Some things just don't fucking change. Not down here. That's part of why I like it.
no subject
[It's a joke, Dimmy, because talking about the passing of time and how their time there has now passed is just a little hard.]
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[Loving and in good humor, he holds it together long enough to give a stern look before laughing.]
That diner is two miles out of Four Corners. Not Chinatown. I got money all over because I never know where I'm gonna be. The plan was to pull it all together before heading over.
[His plan alone.]
Some people can't go up to an ATM and get cash out.
no subject
Just checking.
[Of course Larry's prepared for all sorts of situations, Freddy wouldn't expect any less of him.]
So there's always gonna be some place I don't really know about until we get there huh?
no subject
[Holding back when they're partners with equal shares goes right against the way of things. Larry tries to comb Freddy's hair just like he tries to smooth over that doubt.]
Just in case I'll write em down so if anything happens, you'll know where to start looking.
[Providing again, sharing too. A link between them that's more than blood. Not quite that L word.]
Y'got plenty, man. Don't fret a second. Pulling it together is the bitch.
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