orangetoughguy | log post II

[Woah, woah, hey. Larry grips Freddy's shoulder for balance if he's gonna go slapping his knee. It wasn't expected. Though the contact, not going to fib here, he likes.]

We'd need something to catch it with for one. And for two, something to put it in and three what the fuck do we do with it when it's caught.

[You know, practicality? Details like that need to be considered ahead of time though Larry didn't think at all about a threat in the water. Back home there weren't things like that to put a damper on the trip.

Now he's really looking over the water from where he stands.]

I dunno.

[Great answer, Newendyke. Oh yeah, he knocks on Larry's leg again.]

Sit down before you fall out.

Hey, would you quit it or I will.

[Sitting means you gotta let go, kid. Besides, he's still gripping on Freddy's shoulder pretty tightly.]

[Oh. Right. Freddy dusts that pants leg knee off a bit before letting go so Larry can sit.]

At least the oar survived.

[A pat to the head of that solid anchor, then he sits.]

Good to know. Let's get the fuck out of here.

[Onward to somewhere else.]

Where to?

[He's asking because, well, isn't it obvious Larry's the Captain of this ship? And it's too hard to keep in, the kid looks amused. He's trying not to laugh at it all.]

A little more civilization. Animals keep away from that.

[Except for Jaws. Something. Fuck, man. Larry is getting out a cigarette before taking up the other oar.

Of course, moving the oar around and standing in the fucking boat has the old man's shirt a little wet.]

Okay. Let's find one of those buildings.

[The ones that look like even after the curse that's exactly how they're supposed to be. Venetian. Wouldn't that make a great Vegas casino? Freddy should market his ideas. He starts rowing.]

When I was workin' patrol we got this call out to Sun Valley, to a trailer park. We didn't have much to go on except the guy livin' there wasn't answering the door or the landlady's calls. She went to check it out but stopped dead in her tracks when she caught the smell.

[Yeah Freddy because a story like that after Jaws and a snapping turtle is so comforting.]

Cool by me.

[Anywhere but here.That's what he cares about. It could be a gas station for all Larry cares about. And no, it's not because he's scared or nothing. Put that idea right out of your mind if it is even there at all.]

No body noticed the mail piling up?

[Unless Jaws is in the living room, then yes it is comforting. Could have been yet another victim of the land-shark.]

Trailer park. [Freddy says like it's the only explanation anybody needs.] So we go in, you know the drill. "Buddy open the door!" But there's no answer and you can smell this thing from the outside. We get the landlady to open the place up, guns dawn and everything, it's dark cause the sun's goin' down and we're calling out to the guy 'cept there ain't anyone inside.

Me and my partner hear this [Freddy sounds a hssssssssssss.] Just one after the other. The guy collected exotic snakes. Big ones. The bastards are everywhere.

My partner, he was a boot. [The unspoken part is "more a boot than I was."] He starts doin' this dance all over the place, "Newendyke! Newendyke! Freddy! Newendyke! Do something!" Like what the fuck am I supposed to do I'm not a snake wrangler.

[Must have been one of those trailer parks where no body cares what anyone else does. So, probably not too many old women. Correction, bored old women.]

Holy shit. How many were in there? What the fuck did you do?

[Obviously not wrangle the snakes. Though curious to see officers try and handle snakes.]

Do you think they ate the bastard?

I think it was twelve, I don't remember the number, something like four rattlesnakes and a couple a vipers though. One monitor lizard.

[He waves a hand because the number doesn't matter. It was probably smaller than he remembers but felt bigger at the time. As for what the fuck he did, well.] I don't think they ate the bastard, I know they did. See the boot couldn't handle it he danced his way back out, well someone had to clear the place to make sure the guy was there, see if anyone else was hurt, what if someone let those snakes out to get'im you know? I go in with my gun drawn up but I'm lookin' all over the floor, at the shelves and shit because I didn't want one of those motherfuckers flying at my face.

I get to the bathroom and there's the guy in his tub with a fuckin' snake in his lap and a big fuckin' lizard all over his head. Eating it. DOA.

Why in the hell would anyone want to own a fucking zoo like that?

[Emphasis on the types of animals. All those lizards. He shakes his head.]

Dogs would at least wait until they're fuckin' starving to eat you I hear. But damn. Those things they're cold blooded, that's how they are. They don't even know who's the boss.

[As for the bathroom discovery Larry stops rowing to look Freddy in the face in shock.]

Beats me. [The profiler said a couple things about lizard lovers but not much Freddy can care to remember. That's why he works robbery and narc though, the lizard thing...that's the stuff serial killers are made of. Er, is Larry looking at him funny?]

What? I didn't tell'em to get rid of the evidence.

[That's a joke, honestly. He can remember clear as a bright sun shiney day in Beverly Hills how he got yelled at for trampling the crime scene. Even though really no crime occurred.]

[Is he a sick fuck for laughing? Because Larry's laughing. The shark bullshit that was unbelievable, this is a little up there too.]

You sure you don't have command lizards? One of your friends in the water mighta been listening.

[Is there a super hero that only talks to lizards? There's a thought. Though he knows for a fact that's not Freddy's super power. Oh no.]

[Somewhere down the waterways a gondola floats by carrying rather fancy looking patrons. He pays them no mind, why pay attention to anyone else when Freddy can lift a brow curiously at Larry.]

Do I look like a lizard guy to you?

[The answer should be 'no' because the kid far prefers warm blooded creatures...like dogs and bears.]

[This reminds the old man of the movies. Except usually the peace is disrupted by gunfire or some kind of explosion or car chase.

Or romance.]

Lemme take another look at you.

[One side, the other side. Nope. Just the stately slope of his nose, floppy hair.]

Nope. I guess not. Don't look like a fish man either.

They're okay. They don't do much if you talk to'em though. I like company.

[That's not...a subtle remark or anything. Honestly.]

Me too.

[His smile could easily be about the weather, the occasion, something like that to anyone else who doesn't know any better. That one is for you, kiddo.

Off the wall hypothetical talk is all part of the Freddy experience.]

[A little bit of time passing leads to said kiddo stretched out in the boat again, arms tired from rowing as their vessel just floats on by. He doesn't have a line out this time, letting the old man do all the fishing for them. There's some music playing too, not far but not right next to them either. They must be close to the Palace.]

You hear that?

Yeah I do.

[The sun is disappearing more and more behind the buildings. Some streets have more light than others but the lanterns are on. Rather nice with the purple hues seeping into the golden reds.]

What do you say we disembark awhile?

[Night fishing doesn't sound as enjoyable as taking advantage of the dark. The closer they drift, the more audible the music becomes.]

Sure. Where?

[He looks over at Larry, riding the same wavelength but not completely wanting to say it in the event they aren't riding the same wavelength and one is being more sentimental than the other.]

[Where indeed.]

There.

[He points to what almost looks like a dead end. The waterway street ends, the sidewalk continues beyond in a small alleyway. There's even a fire hydrant to anchor their vessel.

Larry turns their radio off so that the music can flow. Sounds pretty close.]

Okay. [He gets his oar back out to paddle their way towards the hydrant, slow and leisurely. Freddy loops the tube chain around it--did you think he was going to settle for an old fashioned rope? Boats are a hot commodity today, no way is he gonna risk it. It's like college kids who are advised to lock their bikes cause the cops aren't gonna waste their time looking for one that wasn't even locked down.]

After you.

[Freddy gestures, age before beauty again. He's trying to make out the song playing but doesn't recognize it just yet.]

[Not even Newendyke sort of cops? Harsh world. Larry remembers the day one of his bikes went missing. Well, missing as in purloined by the only person who knew the combination. That's how people lose things. You live and learn. And you carry firearms to protect what's yours.]

Thanks fella.

[Oh shit. Is that David Bowie? He's suggesting they put on their red shoes and dance the blues. Larry steps onto solid ground, then offers up his hand to Freddy.]

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