orangetoughguy | log post II

Nobody offered to pay me in mutt. [Freddy remarks as if reminding Larry he took the bird as a payment is gonna help. Ahem. A tilt of the head and he's thinking the same thing about the naming business but the kid also likes the idea of naming the avian freak himself. Okay though, not Fred.] How about Sam, whatdya think of that?

[He's asking Larry and the bird this time.] Looks like he's looking at you.

[Duh. Hop hop and the toucan's on the floor approaching Lawrence Dimick. Hop hop hop head tilts and all. The bird takes a light poke at Larry's toe.]

Right.

[Still there is time. Boy though the way he's looking at that flying nose it's easy to see that Freddy wants to keep it. There's nothing the old man can say without upsetting things. Fuck.]

Sam. Toucan Sam. Hah.

[You won another smile, Freddy. His eyes drop as the bird makes it's move.] Hey! Shit! [The old man is in nothing but his socks. He attempts a retreat...closer to Freddy.] Motherfucker wants to fight.

[Freddy stays right where he is, serving as a protector to Larry (for once, or twice). Yes, he's kind of amused that a little bird could send Mr. White retreating for cover.]

He's just checking you out, man. The little dude took a stab at me, nothin' doin'.

[He holds his hand up to Larry showing a flawless freckled palm. See? No permanent marks or bloodshed or anything like that. Hop hop hop. It's still going for Larry's toes. What would really make it happy is a whole sock to itself.] So...can we keep'im?

[See? He's asking.]

[Protector? Larry is moving to be sure he doesn't kick Sam.]

Yeah? Was he looking at you like that?

[No marks or scars. Of course Sam goes in for the toes once again.] Ow. Come on, leggo. [He fishes for something out of the hamper to drop in hopes of distracting. Of course the kid has to ask when Larry is caring the least for the thing.]

He needs a cage.

[To stay in.]

He's looking at you like a bird looks at stuff.

[Duh, Freddy remarks ever so casually as Sam does his Sammish thing. Oh hey yellow boxers. Voila, the bird's got green eyes and a red breast now as it burrows around in the bright fabric. The kid still can't help but laugh, then when the old man mentions a cage his own green eyes warm up. That's a yes?]

Yeah? A big one? Just to eat and sleep in. [And shit in, the man did say toucans can be litter-trained, although he didn't quite explicitly say this one is.] He seems cool hopping around like that.

Stuff to chew or eat. Could chomp on toes if it wanted to.

[That beak is for something.

The toucan is kind of cute when it's playing around again. It looks like a rainbow down there. Larry remembers a trip to the zoo years and years ago. Shit like that is what keeps him moving back to feeling okay about a bird. Sure isn't a dog.]

A big one...remember he's gotta be somewhere when you go to work. [Relief to hear that the bird is going to sleep in a cage. A cage down here, right? Not in any of their rooms, right?] He hops like a pigeon.

So don't piss'im off.

[Freddy counters with a big smile. Just pulling your chain, Lawrence Dimick, now that it seems they're both agreed to keeping the feathery fiend. Burrow burrow, the bird decides the shorts are no longer interesting and hops out one of the legs to venture towards the stairs. Flap flap and it's flying up, just to perch on the handrail. Again it looks at Larry. Just staring.]

I got it I got. [About the cage.] I bet I can work my way up to taking him to work. [He nods then gestures to his own nose.] When you got a big bill you gotta adapt.

Oh yeah. Me piss him off.

[Doesn't the bird know that his mere presence brings anger into the picture? Lawrence Dimick isn't going to give in. No sir. He can live with a bird. Yep. Nothin' doin.]

Woah, look at him fly.

[Naturally they got to stare at him hanging out up there.]

Hey, he's doing it again. With the staring.] See? [Naturally Freddy is going to call it nothing. Sigh. Well then he'll handle the cage deal. That's okay. He finds himself to be slightly unsure of what he means by taking the bird to work, does he mean walking around like a pirate? Drop it, Larry.]

Bill to to pay for the bill.

He could be lookin' at me.

[Freddy suggests seeing as how they're standing next to each other. What does Larry think about that eh? Meanwhile the bird's just staring, staring, then preening. Lucky for them toucans don't produce feather dust or whatever it's called. No shedding unlike mammals.]

You sure you don't mind? I felt bad for the guy. [Both bird and man.] But I bet someone else can take real good care of him too.

[The kid would just love to have a try at keeping something as cool as this though.]

I don't think he looks at you the same way he looks at me.

[He thinks. It's too early to tell. Kinda cute the way he's all ruffled and combing himself with his beak.]

He's not so bad. The bird can stay. [A while. For now. The old bear puts an arm around Freddy Newendyke, the mechanic that's for the birds.]

You talk like you know a lot of toucans.

[His tone says, "I bet you don't." So that's that, ah but a thick arm around him feels so fucking good and comfortable. Freddy smiles brightly.] Cool. So you can finish up the laundry and we'll go find a big fuckin' cage for the guy. He can pay his rent in entertainment.

[Oh and one more thing.] Lemme help you finish that up. [The rest of the laundry he means of course.]

I know looks.

[Shrug.] It's a useful skill. Saves a whole lotta chitchat and speculation. [Paw rubs the kid's arm before a pat pat. There's work to finish.]

One more load to wash. Shit can go to the dry cleaner later.

[Larry stoops to pick up those yellow undies.]

Well I know talk and that ain't the sound of a bird lookin' for trouble.

[That paw is comforting. Freddy wouldn't really take an animal in if he didn't think there was some potential for it getting on just fine with minor effort on their parts. A trained toucan is a welcome toucan. Hop hop. Fly and perch. The bird's decided to hitch a ride on top of the dirty laundry.]

Maybe we'll get free beer outta him.

Okay then, pal. You can be the interpreter. I don't speak bird.

[Nobody likes to fight needlessly. So the bird can be touchy, it's not full out attacking. And it's pretty quiet. The more Larry rationalizes the better he feels. And he also feels more proud of himself.]

Don't go getting my hopes up. [Though now he's got a taste for Guinness. Dog knows what he's doing.] Maybe he could be a bottle opener.

It's just an idea.

[The beer thing, what a nice perk it would be. As for opening bottles, Freddy's got to rub his chin on that one. In goes the bird, burrowing through more laundry jsut because it can.] What's the point? I like it when you open'em.

[Oh yeah, the dog knows what he's doing all right.]

Never hurts to check, I mean, if he can change colors what else can he do?

[Optimism for everyone in this house. Larry picks up the hamper and hands it to Freddy, easy and carefully. The kid and the bird can bond more over it. Okay, really he doesn't want to have to fuss with it yet.]

I like openin' em for you. [Among other things.] The bird'll have to find his place.

Find cereal? [He takes the hamper carefully so as not to jostle the bird on top.] You can tell the bird yourself, I mean if anyone knows how to lay down a pecking order it's you.

[Freddy may or may not be teasing Larry about his territorial bear-who-needs-his-space nature. Of course right when he mentions a pecking order at all the bird turns to face Lawrence Dimick as it flushes to an orange and black coloration. Just staring. Like it understands and wants the old man's input.]

You don't need any bird or anything to find cereal. That's one of your super powers.

[Larry is folding a few towels that were draped on the back of the couch.]

Oh yeah? Then I will. [He clears his throat, full attention on the bird. Larry even clunches down a little to be able to look into those small shiny eyes that are sizing him up for sure] Look now, buddy boy. We're taking you into our house. Me and Freddy here, we're in charge. You belong to Freddy, he belongs to me. I belong to him. You gotta listen to what we say. Everything'll be fine from there.

[Brown eyes lift up to Freddy.] How was that? You wanna add anything?

[On this side of things Freddy's trying to process the meaning of that because really one can then construe the fact that if both Larry and the bird belong to Freddy then that puts the bird on par with Larry himself because no one's yet said that by virtue of belonging to Freddy the bird then belongs to Larry. Just saying. For now though the kid just watches this interaction intensely, seeing as how the bird is stretching its neck out towards the old man.]

...Uh....

[If it draws blood it's gonna have to go, even an enthusiastic Newendyke understands this. That big giant bill opens slowly to draw out the suspense. E-e-e-e-ee-e-ee-e-e-e. It almost sounds like alien morse code. Then without another click the bird turns around to stick its tail feathers up at Lawrence Dimick, before pulling some horror movieish turn of its head to lay that weapon across its own back. Right, Freddy looks at Larry.]

Naw, that's good.

[It's not a dog, and if memory serves right it isn't even a talking bird. Still those marble eyes blink and blink almost like he's listening in.]

The hell kind of a noise is that.

[A creepy one. As for the turning and head spinning, he can't make anything of it. The point's been made with it's spots in it. Oh yeah, he realizes. Saying that he belongs to Freddy was making it less of a monarch. Something like that, and ain't it the truth though?]

How big a cage you goin' for? One you can share?

[Seems like the toucan's comfy enough, Freddy will just have to figure out how to put this load in without loading the bird in it. He'll come up with something or other. As for that remark, he just looks at Larry and makes a face.]

Hah hah, real funny. Let's pick up your doghouse while we're at it.

[Is this what they call domestic bliss? Or is it just the calm before the fucking storm? At least no one got mad. Much.]

This part here it's gotta be appendage D. What you have is appendage B. There should be a letter kinda near where you put the screws in.

[He moves his gaze back to squinting to read the directions for the cage. In theory, it made more sense to buy it and assemble it. Sure made it easy taking it into the apartment and up the stairs. ...do they have a policy on pets here? Larry didn't think about that. Then again, too fucking late now.]

Says that you gotta put those into the piece that looks like a barbecue grill.

[At least no one has to do it alone...right?]

I see that.

[Regarding Appendage B, honestly. Freddy goes looking for the right slot for what prong and for once it's not some kinky ass metaphor. Ah there it is. He positions the bars for bolting. ...So it Larry going to help him out with that or is he just reading the instructions eh? As for pets in the apartment, shit man the rent's not pocket change, for the cost they deserve to have a pet. Besides, the kid recalls somewhere in the lease stating pets to be no bigger than 35lbs. The toucan is so much lighter. Speaking of that fella, the bird's busy taking a watermelon slice apart on the kitchen counter. Perfectly clean place for a bird, and yes Freddy's already had to wipe up a mess here and there.]

[Rustle, rustle of the instructions. He's folding it over. Back up at Freddy to see the progress.]

So you wanna keep this down here? [Please. Please keep it down here. No bedroom bird. Munch, munch munch on that watermelon. They're in season after all. He stops a moment to look at the toucan go to town.]

Your pal loves that melon.

[Larry sets down the paper to pop in a few metal pieces as well.]

Why they gotta print everything so small?

Yeah, I sure as hell ain't moving it upstairs after all this.

[Freddy wipes his brow with a 'whew'. Setting it up by a window is good enough, gives the bird sky on one side and shelter on the other. There's a log with a hole in it just ready to be installed so he has a place to hide for whatever reason too. Nice of them to pick up so much for one unannounced bird. As for the melon, damn right it's going to town. Taking care to separate the seeds from the rest too. Who knows why. Peck peck tok. Then it raises its head to stare at Larry, like Sam Knows he's being talked about.]

Saves paper or something, okay hold onto this, I'm gonna do the washer and nuts.

[It sounds so dirty. Oh look now here comes the bird hopping over to see what's going on, complete with watermelon on its face.]

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject