[Elbows. But back to business for certain. Even though he's begrudging Freddy for not heading in first, Larry would prefer it. It's not a carjacking. Both of them are careful, sure. But accidents happen. And they don't deserve to happen to the damn kid this go-round.]
Thanks.
[These buildings creak and groan with almost every step on the wooden entry way. Even more on the steps.]
Looks like this is it.
[He takes the key out of his pocket. It looks even more out of place with that cat wearing a strawberry as a hat.]
[Oof. The elbowing just gets a look from the kid. Where accidents are concerned he'd rather they not abide by a system that places Larry--the more experienced one--in the line of fire but the old man is also stubborn and...Freddy has to admit he tends to know better. When Freddy's experience is of greater benefit, he expects the other one to stand down. For now though, it's Lawrence Dimick wielding the kitty key.]
No smell.
[Says the observant cop. Still sometimes a lack of odor doesn't mean shit. That's why Freddy's getting his gun out, Larry may be going in first but this tough guy's got his back.] Ready.
[Freddy manages not to roll his eyes over that veteran-to-rookieish comment. Larry's just being Larry and that's okay with him for now. Anyway gun out he slips around the doorway to press his back against the wall. Like a fucking professional, this cop.]
Get the--
[...light. The professional quickly drops away for one shocked Freddy Newendyke. Together the two sound their surprise in stereo.] Holy shit.
[Picking up his jaw is kind of hard to do. The kid makes sure the door behind them is locked before following the old man to inspect the goods. Shit that is a flame thrower. Is that some kind of disgruntled looking penguin toy?]
I told you she was different.
[Special. Hiding something. Whichever fits the bill. Freddy tucks his gun away to pick up what looks like a customized sniper rifle, sized for little girls.] Jesus what does she need a whole fuckin' artillery cache for?
[And he means it. For now those brown eyes are on the kid who made this possible. Freddy's the one who befriends all kinds of people. Fuck, he's downright likable, ain't he? Even to gun-toting little girls.
His attention is now on that flamethrower. It looks a bit aged, maybe an 80s piece. Certainly not what the boys in 'Nam handled, not so far off though.]
Wow.
[The toys are completely disregarded. They don't matter.]
Beats me. Guess she had a bully or something.
[Stupid joke but he laughs anyway.]
Oh man would you look at the ammo. [A whole damn crate. And anyone can bet there are more than one kind of caliber in there.] We won't have to worry about that for a long, long time.
[Larry gets a brief look for that remark. Different, he sure is.]
I knocked down a couple jerks in my day. [Snort. Yes, talking like an old man he is.] But I sure as hell never needed ammo.
[The sight on this piece is still in perfect order. Put it down, Newendyke, don't act like they're toys. But they look like so much fun. Freddy sets the rifle aside to turn his attention towards the flame thrower.] D'you know how to use that thing?
[Freddy sure don't. Oh hey now, a whole fucking crate? Wait wait.] What if she comes back?
Hey hey hey watch where you're pointing that thing.
[In other circumstances Freddy would phrase his words in such a way only for comedic effect but the big hard thing he's pointing this time is genuinely dangerous. As for worrying about it when she comes back...the kid shrugs once. That totally works for him just find.]
Shit the kid didn't even have a job, whose milk money did she fuckin' jack for all this?
[He's looking around Larry's shoulder to the shelf of grenades.] It ain't even home made crap, it looks paramilitary grade.
Of course, baby. No way we'd have to take it all. All this comes with a case.
[He gestures all around them.]
But since we're here we may as well take a thing or two home.
[Right? Right? His grip tightens on his arm. All of this shit. This would make any heist a breeze. That's how his mind functions. They haven't had a need for much at all for months but again and again that's where his mind goes.]
........ [Right. Larry's kind of cute when he's excited. Freddy reaches up to pat the paw dangling on his shoulder.] Did you bring a pen and some paper?
[They do have network devices but this sort of deal just calls for "old fashioned" methods. Maybe there's paper and a pen in here somewhere. Chances are the pen probably has a knife in it too.]
[So Larry doesn't have to carry the cat-with-a-strawberry-hat on him. He'll make sure to get the old man a key cover shaped like Huckleberry Hound instead. Hm, but seeing as how this is some kind of apartment...]
Are we gonna have to pay the rent on this place? [If they wanna fuck around in it of course, or they could fuck then run with the guns.]
[He's inclined to keep it right now only because the girl left it for him this way. It would be rude and unfriendly and just not cool to take it off. Would Larry understand that Freddy genuinely considered her pretty cool too? Oh, but about these arms and those arms. Green eyes wander from face to paw to grenades to flamethrower and back to his face. The kid leans in a little more.]
Are you getting stiff?
[The clearest path between two points is a straight line after all. Note, he's not saying it as a complaint or anything.]
[Freddy flaps a hand in a shrug, only to bring said hand down to grab Larry right between the thighs. Is he hard for real? If not is he gonna be hard now?]
Here?
[He asks, brow arched as if daring Larry to take what he wants when he wants it however he wants it. Except focusing behind the old man's shoulder he spies another toy, some kind of comical looking blue bat creature. Yeah those toys are a boner crusher...but that crate of clips...shit.]
[Right over the crate. Fuck now Freddy's starting to feel pretty fucking warm. He's got to make a quick decision, desecrate a little girl's place--for keeping a shitload of artillery--or go home hard. The smell of gun oil and ammunition just isn't the same when you're only trying to imagine it. He takes a deeper breath.]
No.
[That hand on the old man kneads against his loaded gun.] You're a tough as nails gunrunner and I'm a greenhorn who just broke into the wrong cache.
[N-O. Spells no, sure, the rest of it though says yes with a lot of other letters. Larry pulls back and gives the kid a shove. He'll bite and he'll bite hard.]
Tch. That some kind of an excuse?
[To fuck the shit out of him?]
You got some kinda balls comin' on in here. And you're not gonna be gettin' out of here easy.
[Another shove, farther away from the toys that the old man has his back to.]
[Hey now. That totally comes as a surprise to the kid because sure yeah he set this up but the old man started playing along faster than expected. In character too. Freddy straightens his shirt a bit.]
I don't know what the fuck you're on cause--
[Oof. That second shove has Freddy taking another step back only to hit his heel on the crate and stumble. He catches the edges and steadies himself.] What're you gonna do? Lay another hand on me? I fight back.
[The old man takes off his coat and tosses it aside. Nevermind the dirt. It's the end of the day. After this they'd head on home. If they ever make it there. Now he's loosening his tie.]
Don't mean that'll do you any good. You're mine, bucko. From the minute you stepped in.
[Two steps. (Not three.) And he's gripping Freddy by the collar of his shirt.]
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[Elbows. But back to business for certain. Even though he's begrudging Freddy for not heading in first, Larry would prefer it. It's not a carjacking. Both of them are careful, sure. But accidents happen. And they don't deserve to happen to the damn kid this go-round.]
Thanks.
[These buildings creak and groan with almost every step on the wooden entry way. Even more on the steps.]
Looks like this is it.
[He takes the key out of his pocket. It looks even more out of place with that cat wearing a strawberry as a hat.]
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No smell.
[Says the observant cop. Still sometimes a lack of odor doesn't mean shit. That's why Freddy's getting his gun out, Larry may be going in first but this tough guy's got his back.] Ready.
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[Key slips right on into the lock. There's no mistaking this is the place.]
Get your gun out. Just in case.
[Oh. Looks like the kid is way ahead of him. He does the same.]
Three. Two. [Click as the bolt retracts into the door.] One. [Larry turns the nob. Still no smell. And the place is dark. ]
There's gotta be a light in this place.
[Leaving the key in the door he gets a free hand to feel along the wall. Ah. There we go. Light.]
Holy cow.
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[Freddy manages not to roll his eyes over that veteran-to-rookieish comment. Larry's just being Larry and that's okay with him for now. Anyway gun out he slips around the doorway to press his back against the wall. Like a fucking professional, this cop.]
Get the--
[...light. The professional quickly drops away for one shocked Freddy Newendyke. Together the two sound their surprise in stereo.] Holy shit.
[Guns fucking galore. And plush animals?!]
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It's like Santa's arsenal.
[Seeing as it's just them, Two Guns puts his one away.]
Is that a flamethrower?
[Over he goes to inspect.]
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[Picking up his jaw is kind of hard to do. The kid makes sure the door behind them is locked before following the old man to inspect the goods. Shit that is a flame thrower. Is that some kind of disgruntled looking penguin toy?]
I told you she was different.
[Special. Hiding something. Whichever fits the bill. Freddy tucks his gun away to pick up what looks like a customized sniper rifle, sized for little girls.] Jesus what does she need a whole fuckin' artillery cache for?
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[And he means it. For now those brown eyes are on the kid who made this possible. Freddy's the one who befriends all kinds of people. Fuck, he's downright likable, ain't he? Even to gun-toting little girls.
His attention is now on that flamethrower. It looks a bit aged, maybe an 80s piece. Certainly not what the boys in 'Nam handled, not so far off though.]
Wow.
[The toys are completely disregarded. They don't matter.]
Beats me. Guess she had a bully or something.
[Stupid joke but he laughs anyway.]
Oh man would you look at the ammo. [A whole damn crate. And anyone can bet there are more than one kind of caliber in there.] We won't have to worry about that for a long, long time.
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I knocked down a couple jerks in my day. [Snort. Yes, talking like an old man he is.] But I sure as hell never needed ammo.
[The sight on this piece is still in perfect order. Put it down, Newendyke, don't act like they're toys. But they look like so much fun. Freddy sets the rifle aside to turn his attention towards the flame thrower.] D'you know how to use that thing?
[Freddy sure don't. Oh hey now, a whole fucking crate? Wait wait.] What if she comes back?
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[That's where the gas goes in. The straps are naturally for portability. Uh huh. Uh huh.]
I haven't used one before but I can figure it out.
[Larry lifts up the pieced that obviously dispenses the flames.]
We'll worry about it when she comes back.
[There are so many other things to see. There are metal boxes begging to be opened. It is so much like Christmas.]
Would you look at this. [Settled together like a half a dozen eggs are grenades.]
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[In other circumstances Freddy would phrase his words in such a way only for comedic effect but the big hard thing he's pointing this time is genuinely dangerous. As for worrying about it when she comes back...the kid shrugs once. That totally works for him just find.]
Shit the kid didn't even have a job, whose milk money did she fuckin' jack for all this?
[He's looking around Larry's shoulder to the shelf of grenades.] It ain't even home made crap, it looks paramilitary grade.
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[No lie looking over all of this threatens to make the old man hard. All this fire power and it's theirs.]
Holy fuck. It's enough power to challenge an army and it's all ours.
[The bear lumbers over to Freddy to throw an arm over his shoulder.]
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Hey you can't just take everything. I mean a little sure, but you're not gonna use everything all at once. That's wasteful or whatever.
[So says Newendyke under Dimick's arm, trying to talk some sense into them both even though he'd love to give that flamethrower a whirl.]
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[He gestures all around them.]
But since we're here we may as well take a thing or two home.
[Right? Right? His grip tightens on his arm. All of this shit. This would make any heist a breeze. That's how his mind functions. They haven't had a need for much at all for months but again and again that's where his mind goes.]
After a full inventory.
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[They do have network devices but this sort of deal just calls for "old fashioned" methods. Maybe there's paper and a pen in here somewhere. Chances are the pen probably has a knife in it too.]
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[Rather than pulling away he keeps that arm around Freddy and looks through his own coat one handed.]
Fuck. Nope. Not today. Guess we'll have to come back for that.
[What a crying shame.]
I say we fuck around now and get down to business later.
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[So Larry doesn't have to carry the cat-with-a-strawberry-hat on him. He'll make sure to get the old man a key cover shaped like Huckleberry Hound instead. Hm, but seeing as how this is some kind of apartment...]
Are we gonna have to pay the rent on this place? [If they wanna fuck around in it of course, or they could fuck then run with the guns.]
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[Those rubber things come off. That's what he's thinking. No one has to have that kitty thing. Unless Freddy wants to keep it. That's up to him.]
I dunno. That's a good question.
[Arms are still on the big guy since it's just them. And the guns and the flamethrower and the grenades and the bullets and...]
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Are you getting stiff?
[The clearest path between two points is a straight line after all. Note, he's not saying it as a complaint or anything.]
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[And it is all theirs. Fuck if they sold it that is so much fucking money. No matter what they do with it, it's an incredible asset.]
If your friend ever comes around again she deserves a hell of a thank you.
[Not that he's trying to downplay how riled he is. Just a thought.]
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[Freddy flaps a hand in a shrug, only to bring said hand down to grab Larry right between the thighs. Is he hard for real? If not is he gonna be hard now?]
Here?
[He asks, brow arched as if daring Larry to take what he wants when he wants it however he wants it. Except focusing behind the old man's shoulder he spies another toy, some kind of comical looking blue bat creature. Yeah those toys are a boner crusher...but that crate of clips...shit.]
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You want me to walk home with a stiff one when I could bend you over that.
[Oh he's pointing to that crate.]
[Already paws are moving to creep under Freddy's shirt.]
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No.
[That hand on the old man kneads against his loaded gun.] You're a tough as nails gunrunner and I'm a greenhorn who just broke into the wrong cache.
[Will Larry bite?]
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Tch. That some kind of an excuse?
[To fuck the shit out of him?]
You got some kinda balls comin' on in here. And you're not gonna be gettin' out of here easy.
[Another shove, farther away from the toys that the old man has his back to.]
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[Hey now. That totally comes as a surprise to the kid because sure yeah he set this up but the old man started playing along faster than expected. In character too. Freddy straightens his shirt a bit.]
I don't know what the fuck you're on cause--
[Oof. That second shove has Freddy taking another step back only to hit his heel on the crate and stumble. He catches the edges and steadies himself.] What're you gonna do? Lay another hand on me? I fight back.
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[The old man takes off his coat and tosses it aside. Nevermind the dirt. It's the end of the day. After this they'd head on home. If they ever make it there. Now he's loosening his tie.]
Don't mean that'll do you any good. You're mine, bucko. From the minute you stepped in.
[Two steps. (Not three.) And he's gripping Freddy by the collar of his shirt.]
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