orangetoughguy

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14th

[Shifty sneaky surveillance video is on, showing a seemingly complacent monkey toy creature beast thing sitting on top of a tool box. Your narrator whispers.]

It's still watching me. [The camera pans around...around...and the monkey's head follows.] This shit is so fucked up, I mean really fucked up, an experiment in Romero fuckin' fear fucked up.

[...Arrrrooouuund...a full 180 degrees. THE SCREECHING AND ATTACKING BEGINS. Said narrator shouts "SHIT!" as the camera attempts a hasty retreat. The video feed ends on a tight close up of enraged bulging monkey eyes.]

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Off what.

Off me, my friends, and my business. Unless you'd prefer me to rethink my lack of involvement with yours.

Edited 2011-02-24 05:27 (UTC)

I haven't done crap to your friends just like I said I wouldn't. That Amory guy's still on his feet.

You're involving yourself with them. If I remember right, that was part of the deal. What the hell is with ringing up my girlfriend to scold her over trust issues?

News to me.

I rang her up cause someone had to. She didn't wanna give me the full story, I kind of expected that. I told her it'd help her to talk it out with somebody, somebody who ain't you obviously.

The full story of what? The fact that she's dating? She's practically twenty, not twelve. And I'm pretty sure her best friend is okay with filling the girltalk role better than you do.

I don't know, why it looked like it came out of left fuckin' field to some of these friends of yours I'm not supposed to be talkin' to, like Angela who'd be way better at this than me or your buddy Eden who throws a fuckin' fit over hearin' her name in the same breath as yours. I told you I wasn't expecting that person to be me but when I heard her I fuckin' knew nobody was givin' this girl any real time.

Are you for real? You haven't got the first clue about her. Like Eden not being her first turning point for a sounding board.

Sounds like nobody else does except you, ain't that convenient.

Her best friend, who lives with her and knew about this practically from the start, she doesn't count? It was never a secret from Angela, or anyone.

...I don't even know why I'm wasting the effort on someone who rings up a girl he barely knows and repeatedly demands to know if she's been having sex.

No Oscar for you if you think you pulled that off with any amount of finesse. Oh yeah and I kinda asked her once.

Think I'm going to take her word over yours on that. And what exactly do you think you're holding me to account for? I'm not the one trying to pull off an act.

Have you told her you decided you're just a phase for her?

I think she's aware I won't be with her forever. [It does come with the mortality.] So who else have you been talking to? Must have been a hell of a slow week.

I don't think she is and maybe I got her pegged wrong but I'm willing to bet that kinda blow comes a little harder when you're cherry. Were cherry.

I had the week off. [Thanks, Saya.] I talked your girl Eden out of greeting you with a grenade. [You're welcome, fff.]

You've got her pegged wrong. But this is the second time you've taken a running jump at the wrong conclusions, so I can't say I'm surprised. Want to lecture me about my life? The more people you get close to the more there are to get hurt when someone catches on to what you're about. Maybe you should look at that.

Whatever makes you sleep easy at night, big man.

Nobody's gonna catch on to what I'm about if you keep your mouth shut.

[There's a phone dialling in the background. Quiet ringing at the other end of the line.]

No, nobody's going to find out if you find someone else to waste your time gossiping about.

Not everything's about you, doc.

You've bothered me, questioned half the people I know, and harassed my girlfriend over our personal life. That's what I'd like you to stop.

[And the other line picks up. His voice warms.]

Hey.

Tell all the people you know don't come to me either if you can say it without usin' my gun as a crutch.

Without the guns, I'd have a lot less problem with them coming to you. Actually, I'd just have a lot less problem with you.

[And it's Claire's voice, small but recognisable.]

Are you talking to who I think you're talking to?

Yeah, Orange had a few more honesty issues he wanted to clear up. Should I ask you now or just email you the recording?

At least I'm not a fuckin' vampire or Morlock.

[The Marvel Universe kind. He mutters this part more only because he's already got an idea what comes next. Oh look it's Claire.]

Hey girl.

Wait... what? What honesty issues? Am I on threeway?

You're on the phone, he's on the network. And he thinks it's important I share with you that we might not be together for the rest of our lives. I wanted to get that cleared up so that he can take a step back with peace of mind.

...Okay. Well. It's only been like a month so this isn't really a big surprise to me, but thanks for clearing it up?

Great. Sorry I had to bother you with it. [He leans back toward the device.] Anything else? Or can we agree that we've both gratified you with enough.

[Really, Chase? Really?? That's dirty pool, though clever. Because that's not what he meant goddamn.]

You're an asshole, doc.

[Now he talks to Claire.] I can't talk to you anymore, girl. Sorry.

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